Theiving Alpaca

knittingman's picture

See all of the gorgeous images on my main blog at knittingman.wordpress.com

I don't quite understand, but it's happened two years in a row. I'm totally mystified. You'd think that a wool market would be totally safe. It's like the comic con of knitters. Why on earth would criminals go miles out of their way to come to a little mountain town like Estes Park, Colorado? Nonetheless, it happened. I came to the 2013 Estes Park Wool Market and I was robbed.

A former boyscout, I came to the market prepared. I had cash on hand, just in case the car broke down and we needed assistance. It was only a couple hundred dollars- just enough to be safe. I didn't think about wearing one of those under clothes wallets. It's Estes Park, for Pete's sake.

I'm not sure when it happened. I'm starting to think there is a great conspiracy. Perhaps this whole thing was set up to get me away from my money. Maybe it happened while I was distracted by all the gorgeous colors.

It might have been while I was trying out one of the coolest toys ever- a WooLee Winder. In a bizarre coincidence, it even happened to be on the same model wheel I owned- a Schacht Matchless.

At first, I was enchanted to come across a young boy spinning yarn, but in retrospect, I think he may have been scouting out unwitting dupes to steal from.Boy Spinning

It could have been the sheep. They were masters at distracting me with their sweet fibery goodness. When I wasn't looking, one of them might have reached a dirty cloven hoof into my pocket and extracted my hard earned cash.

If it wasn't them, the Alpaca must have been the culprits. These sneaky little things unabashedly threw themselves at me, offering up hugs and kisses. Surely they had opportunity to get to my wallet.

I think the God Father and criminal mastermind behind all of this must have been the Jacob Ram. He walked with an air of superiority that only the kingpin of a major criminal organization could.

I'm pretty sure the Paco-Vicunas were his little darlings. They were living high on the hog in a tent of their own with the angora bunnies to keep them company. I imagine the rabbits were gifts the Jacob bought with the thousands of dollars he raked in from events like these all over the country.

Although I was disappointed to find that my money had gone missing, I will say the trip wasn't all bad. Some poor person must have mistaken my car for theirs and left piles of fiber in it. Had I realized it was there before I left, I certainly would have turned around and tried to return it to them. If you ever come across them, please do let them know that I will be taking good care of the CVM fleece they left behind, along with the hanks of hand dyed fibers. I almost feel guilty making use of the hand painted silk batt I found, but someone has to use it. It may as well be me. The Tracy Eichheim dragon drop spindle was pretty cool too.

Next year, I'll do a better job of taking care of my money. Perhaps I will get one of those silly under garment wallets but something tells me that Jacob has his ways. It's probably best I just accept that the money will be missing and enjoy myself.

Comments

daveballarat's picture

Jonathan, I enjoyed your

Jonathan,
I enjoyed your article, those photos are great. Well done.

Thanks for the link to your blog, finally I have some lovely photos to show people how amazing knitting can be. My pics at the retreat didn't show the shawl at its best so am grateful.

Looking forward to hearing about the progress on your mum's shawl. I described to friends as delicate and complete a bit like a spider's web in ply.
Dave

knittingman's picture

Ill be sure to post lots of

Ill be sure to post lots of pictures when it's done!

steve kadel's picture

best just to leave the fiber

best just to leave the fiber world behind. they dont seem to be at all trust worthy

Potter's picture

Your money was gone and some

Your money was gone and some poor fool packed your car with fibers and toys?
Sounds like some strange intercourse happened over there!

Glad you had fun!

SAPBrown's picture

Sounds like a conspiracy.

Sounds like a conspiracy.
The care package in your car was really a bribe. Next year, bring more bills, you just might lose a few...

Bill's picture

I think the real solution is

I think the real solution is for someone else to carry your wallet!

Joe-in Wyoming's picture

I offer sympathy...and second

I offer sympathy...and second getting a wallet keeper to wear under your shirt. ;-P

Nehkhasi's picture

Pictures of all your fun

Pictures of all your fun fibers! And I'm looking forward to seeing what you are going to do with them!